Communicate Today

Your roommate has done it again. You go to the fridge to fix some dinner, and realize your room mate has used the ingredients you need. You go to the cupboard and realize they have also eaten your mac and cheese. You know it’s time to do something, time to talk to your roommate, but how?

Approaching your roommate about annoying habits like stealing food, leaving the door unlocked or playing music too loud, is never a fun thing to do. However, it can be worth it, and it can make your living situation better, so you’ll both be happier.

The first thing to remember is to make sure you don’t approach your roommate in an accusatory way. Pointing fingers and placing blame will get you nowhere, and fast. People tend to get defensive, shut down and stop listening if they feel they are being blamed for something.

Instead, try coming to your roommate with a solution in mind. Think of ways the problem can be solved, besides telling your roommate to knock it off. If your problem is that they eat your groceries, you could label the packages that are yours. When you approach your roommate, say something like “Hey, so we don’t get our food mixed up, I am going to label mine. Would it be possible for you to check with me before you borrow something?”

This approach is much more open and friendly. It shows your roommate that you are willing to work out a compromise and aren’t there to start a fight. Approaching problems in a positive, open way will lead to solutions much faster. It will also help maintain roommate relationships and can even repair broken friendships.

As you face roommate issues, from storage space to annoying habits, try to approach the roommate with a solution, and watch how willing they will be to work things out with you.

Sometimes it’s hard to have all your roommates on the same page. Especially if you were assigned roommates and didn’t know the people you now live with before you checked in to your apartment. Since everyone comes from different backgrounds and has different personalities, it’s not always easy to communicate with each other.

However, it is possible to communicate with your messy roommate, the roommate who refuses to make more room in the fridge, and yes, even the roommate whose music is so loud you can barely hear yourself think, let alone talk to her.

Clear the Air

If there is ever conflict in your apartment, ignoring it won’t solve anything. Just hoping a problem will go away hardly ever does the trick. Being passive agressive doesn’t help either. So, next time there is an issue between roommates, stop ignoring it, stop writing notes to each other, and just clear the air. Bring up any problems you have in a polite way and with an attitude that shows you want to help resolve the problem. This way, your roommate won’t feel cornered and you will be a part of the solution, not the problem.

Keep an Open Door

Keeping a positive environment in the apartment goes a long way in roommate communication. Try to always be approachable and open so your roommates feel they can talk to you. Chances are, the attitude will be contagious and before you know it your roommates will have the same attitude. When all the people living in your apartment feel free to open up, fewer problems will arise. And, when they do, they will quickly be resolved.

Stay Positive

Whatever you do, always take the positive approach. Instead of pointing fingers, placing blame and telling others to change, be willing to work as part of a group. As your hard-to-live-with roommates see that you are willing to work through problems and even make some changes yourself, they will be much more likely to help fix issues that arise.

Getting along with roommates is part of college and communicating well can make it a positive experience. Next time you sense tension rising in your apartment, keep these tree tips in mind and you’ll be on your way to resolving roommate problems.